Posts Tagged ‘humbling’

Father’s Day is always a bit conflicted for me. And a lot of that has to do with my father. Like every father, mine was a complex combination of good and bad. Days like today remind of this in a painful sort of way. He provided us with many of the basic things a father is supposed to do . But there were also a few things that really hindered me, and that may present a struggle the rest of my life.

So, I am reminded of the power of a father: for good or ill. My own kids will be blessed by my presence. But not always. I bump up against my weaknesses all the time. Parenting is meant to humble and sanctify me. While there are times of great joy and immense fun, there are moments when I am utterly exasperated and brought to the end of myself- seeing myself as full of sin, sick and sore.

At times it is if they plan to drive me crazy. After all, this would be an example of talonic justice as I often tried to drive my mother crazy.

For me, being an adoptive father is just like being any old father. They don’t listen or remember, so I say the same thing countless times even in the same day. The concept of an inside voice is utterly foreign to them. So our home is often loud and chaotic. My respect for my father-in-law who raised 6 kids grows steadily.

But, despite my own failings as a parent they have a great affection for me. Those crazy kids.

To catch up on the sagas ….

We actually received the kids passport cards. We aren’t sure how, since they supposedly didn’t have our paperwork. But it ended well. And for that we are thankful.

Still nothing from the IRS as yet another deadline has passed. The story keeps changing. We keep getting the run around We have contacted the Senator’s office. As as result, the new, improved and extended porch has not been started.

Summer has come in earnest as temps are now regularly above 100 degrees. So the kids are not out as often the requests for a movie are more frequent. I am now subjected to various Beverly Hills Chihuahua movies. Each as ridiculous as the rest.

They are quite ready to head the the Farm to visit with their grandparents and cousins. As well as escape the heat (and maybe even math). Hopefully the allergies that continue to plague Amie and Eli as well.

“What do you say to someone who suggests Belgian colonialism might have been the good times?” Anthony Bourdain.

The other night Amie and I watched Anthony Bourdain’s Parts Unknown episode about the Congo. He’s been wanting to see the Congo since reading Conrad’s Heart of Darkness. It was very interesting as he started in Rwanda and traveled west along the Congo. It is so sad to see what has become of such a great land. Such a tragic waste. One day we’ll have to share the sad history of the Congo. But it made me want to re-read The Heart of Darkness.


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